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Through the looking glass darkly? When self-doubts turn into relationship insecurities.

The authors argue that individuals regulate perceptions of their relationships in a self-protective way, finding virtue in their partners only when they feel confident that their partners also see virtues in them. In 4 experiments, the authors posed an acute threat to low and high self-esteem individuals' feelings of self-worth (e.g., guilt about a transgression, fears of being inconsiderate or intellectually inept). They then collected measures of confidence in the partner's positive regard and acceptance (i.e., reflected appraisals) and perceptions of the partner. The results revealed that low self-esteem individuals reacted to self-doubt with heightened doubts about their partners' regard, which then tarnished impressions of their partners. In contrast, high self-esteem individuals reacted to self-doubts by becoming more convinced of their partners' continued acceptance, using their relationships as a resource for self-affirmation.

Adult↗

Interpersonal forgiving in close relationships: II. Theoretical elaboration and measurement.

Interpersonal forgiving was conceptualized in the context of a 2-factor motivational system that governs people's responses to interpersonal offenses. Four studies were conducted to examine the extent to which forgiving could be predicted with relationship-level variables such as satisfaction, commitment, and closeness; offense-level variables such as apology and impact of the offense; and social-cognitive variables such as offender-focused empathy and rumination about the offense. Also described is the development of the transgression-related interpersonal motivations inventory--a self-report measure designed to assess the 2-component motivational system (Avoidance and Revenge) posited to underlie forgiving. The measure demonstrated a variety of desirable psychometric properties, commending its use for future research. As predicted, empathy, apology, rumination, and several indexes of relationship closeness were associated with self-reported forgiving.

Adult↗

"I love you more today than yesterday": romantic partners' perceptions of changes in love and related affect over time.

Partners in romantic relationships provided reports on perceived changes in their love, commitment, and satisfaction and completed contemporaneous scales on the same relationship phenomena multiple times over several years. At each wave of the longitudinal study, participants whose relationships had remained intact perceived that their love and related phenomena had increased since they had last participated in the study. However, their scores on contemporaneous scales did not generally increase over time. Analyses indicated that participants' reports of change were related to actual change in love, commitment, and satisfaction scores and with future relationship stability. Furthermore, participants who experienced a breakup during the longitudinal study reported an overall decrease in their positive affect in the months prior to the breakup.

Adult↗

Attachment and anger in an anxiety-provoking situation.

In this study, women were told they would engage in an anxiety-provoking activity. Women then waited with their dating partner for the activity to begin. During this 5-min "stress" period, each couple's interaction was videotaped unobtrusively. Each couple was then told that the woman would not have to do the stressful activity, and each couple was unobtrusively videotaped again during a 5-min "recovery" period. The behavior of both partners was then coded during both periods. The major results revealed that more-avoidant men displayed greater anger during the stress period, especially if their partners were more anxious or distressed or sought more support from them. More-avoidant women also displayed greater anger, particularly if they were highly anxious or distressed and received little support or encountered anger from their partners. During the recovery period, highly ambivalent women behaved more negatively toward their partners if they had been more anxious in the stress period or had sought more support from their partners. These results are discussed in terms of attachment theory.

Adolescent↗

Commitment, pro-relationship behavior, and trust in close relationships.

The present work advances and tests an interdependence-based model of the associations among commitment, pro-relationship behavior, and trust. Findings from two longitudinal studies revealed good support for model predictions. Commitment-inspired acts such as accommodation and willingness to sacrifice provide diagnostic information regarding a partner's pro-relationship motives. Individuals come to trust their partners when they perceive that their partners have enacted pro-relationship behaviors, departing from their direct self-interest for the good of the relationship. The results of mediation analyses are consistent with a model of mutual cyclical growth in which (a) dependence promotes strong commitment, (b) commitment promotes pro-relationship acts, (c) pro-relationship acts are perceived by the partner, (d) the perception of pro-relationship acts enhances the partner's trust, and (e) trust increases the partner's willingness to become dependent on the relationship. Auxiliary analyses revealed that self-reported attachment style does not account for substantial variance beyond the features of interdependence that form the basis for the present model.

Adult↗

Self-esteem and the quest for felt security: how perceived regard regulates attachment processes.

The authors proposed that personal feelings of self-esteem foster the level of confidence in a partner's regard critical for satisfying attachments. Dating and married couples described themselves, their partners, how they thought their partners saw them, and how they wanted their partners to see them on a variety of interpersonal qualities. The results revealed that low self-esteem individuals dramatically underestimated how positively their partners saw them. Such unwarranted and unwanted insecurities were associated with less generous perceptions of partners and lower relationship well-being. The converse was true for high self-esteem individuals. A longitudinal examination of the dating couples revealed that the vulnerabilities of lows were only exacerbated over time. A dependency regulation model is proposed, wherein felt security in a partner's perceived regard is suggested as a prime mechanism linking self-esteem to relational well-being.

Adaptation, Psychological↗

Self-other agreement in personality and affectivity: the role of acquaintanceship, trait visibility, and assumed similarity.

Self- and other-ratings on the Big Five and a comprehensive inventory of trait affect were obtained from 74 married couples, 136 dating couples, and 279 friendship dyads. With the exception of Surprise, all scales showed significant self-other agreement in all 3 samples, thereby establishing their convergent validity. Consistent with the trait visibility effect, however, the Big Five consistently yielded higher agreement correlations than did the affectivity scales. Conversely, the affective traits consistently showed stronger evidence of assumed similarity (i.e., the tendency for judges to rate others as similar to themselves) than did the Big Five. Cross-sample comparisons indicated that agreement was significantly higher in the married sample than in the other 2 groups; however, analyses of 3 potential moderators in the dating and friendship samples failed to identify the source of this acquaintanceship effect.

Adult↗

Ideals, perceptions, and evaluations in early relationship development.

This research examined partner and relationship perceptions and ideal standards in 100 individuals over time, from the 1st to the 12th month of their dating relationships. As expected, the results revealed that (a) individuals evaluated their relationships on both distinct evaluative components and global evaluative dimensions, (b) higher ideal-perception consistency was associated with higher perceived quality of relationships and partners, (c) more positive perceptions of partners and relationships at earlier points in time were associated with more importance being placed on relevant ideals over time but not vice versa, and (d) higher levels of ideal-perception consistency predicted lower rates of relationship dissolution but were mediated through perceptions of relationship quality. These results support the ideal standards model (Fletcher & Simpson, in press).

Adolescent↗

Attitude alignment in close relationships.

On the basis of principles of balance theory and interdependence theory, this research examined a phenomenon termed attitude alignment, or the tendency of interacting partners to modify their attitudes in such a manner as to achieve attitudinal congruence. The results of three experiments generally were consistent with the proposed model. First, tendencies toward attitude alignment were greater to the extent that attitudinal discrepancies were salient. Second, alignment tendencies were greater to the extent that an issue was central to the partner; there was also evidence that the degree to which an issue was peripheral to the self affected alignment processes (e.g., for changes in centrality of issue, with regard to persuasion methods). Third, degree of alignment tended to be greater in dating-partner interactions than in stranger interactions and tended to be greater among couples with high adjustment than among those with low adjustment.

Adult↗

Love and the commitment problem in romantic relations and friendship.

On the basis of the proposition that love promotes commitment, the authors predicted that love would motivate approach, have a distinct signal, and correlate with commitment-enhancing processes when relationships are threatened. The authors studied romantic partners and adolescent opposite-sex friends during interactions that elicited love and threatened the bond. As expected, the experience of love correlated with approach-related states (desire, sympathy). Providing evidence for a nonverbal display of love, four affiliation cues (head nods, Duchenne smiles, gesticulation, forward leans) correlated with self-reports and partner estimates of love. Finally, the experience and display of love correlated with commitment-enhancing processes (e.g., constructive conflict resolution, perceived trust) when the relationship was threatened. Discussion focused on love, positive emotion, and relationships.

Adolescent↗

Self-control and accommodation in close relationships: an interdependence analysis.

Accommodation refers to the willingness, when a partner has engaged in a potentially destructive behavior, to (a) inhibit impulses toward destructive responding and (b) instead respond constructively. A pilot study and 3 additional studies examined the hypothesis that self-control promotes individuals' ability to accommodate in response to a romantic partner's potentially destructive behavior. Dispositional self-control was positively associated with accommodative tendencies in all 4 investigations. In addition, Study 1 (a retrospective study) and Study 2 (a laboratory experiment) revealed that "in-the-moment" self-regulatory strength depletion decreased the likelihood that an individual would accommodate. Finally, Study 3 demonstrated that self-control exerted a significant effect on accommodation even after the authors included commitment to the relationship in the model. Implications for relationship functioning are discussed.

Adaptation, Psychological↗

When rejection stings: how self-esteem constrains relationship-enhancement processes.

Three experiments examined how needs for acceptance might constrain low versus high self-esteem people's capacity to protect their relationships in the face of difficulties. The authors led participants to believe that their partner perceived a problem in their relationship. They then measured perceptions of the partner's acceptance, partner enhancement, and closeness. Low but not high self-esteem participants read too much into problems, seeing them as a sign that their partner's affections and commitment might be waning. They then derogated their partner and reduced closeness. Being less sensitive to rejection, however, high self-esteem participants affirmed their partner in the face of threat. Ironically, chronic needs for acceptance may result in low self-esteem people seeing signs of rejection where none exist, needlessly weakening attachments.

Courtship↗

Laterally asymmetrical cell number in a sexually dimorphic nucleus in the gerbil hypothalamus is correlated with vocal emission rates.

A lateralized relationship between the total volume of a discrete area in a hypothalamic, sexually differentiated nucleus (SDApc) and stereotyped vocalization exists in male Mongolian gerbils. In this present study, using unbiased stereological methods, two cytoarchitectural estimates of the SDApc's structure, neuron number, and nuclear volume were found to be sexually differentiated and also laterally asymmetrical in adult males. In ovariectomized females receiving exogenous testosterone, no cytoarchitectural component was asymmetrical. Significantly, the estimate of neuron number, but not nuclear volume, in the left SDApc of males was correlated with vocal emission rate. The authors conclude that a specific, sex-related cytoarchitectural SDApc parameter shows left-right asymmetry, suggesting the SDApc has an intimate role in mediating hemispheric specialization rather than just being an end point index of individual structural variability.

Analysis of Variance↗

Gender differences in the age-changing relationship between instrumentality and family contact in emerging adulthood.

Data from the Children in the Community Transitions Study were used to examine gender differences in the impact of family contact on the development of finance and romance instrumentality from ages 17 to 27 years. Family contact decreased among both men and women across emerging adulthood, although it decreased more rapidly in men than in women. Both finance and romance instrumentality increased for men and women across emerging adulthood. The growth rate did not differ between men and women in either domain, although men tended to be characterized by higher levels of instrumentality than women. There were noteworthy gender differences in the impact of family contact on the development of instrumentality. At age 17, family contact was negatively associated with instrumentality for both men and women; at age 27, the impact of family contact on instrumentality was less negative for women and was positive for men.

Adolescent↗

Leaving home or still in the nest? Parent-child relationships and psychological health as predictors of different leaving home patterns.

In this study, the author examines the patterns of leaving home in a sample of 93 participants and their parents. The quality of parent-child relationships, psychological symptomatology in adolescence and young adulthood, and attachment representation were assessed longitudinally from mid-adolescence to young adulthood. Attachment representation, adolescent autonomy, and parent-adolescent conflict were found to be important predictors of the timing of leaving home. In-time leavers were more securely attached and had been granted high autonomy during adolescence, compared with participants who had left home later or had returned to reside in the family home. Young adults with nonnormative leaving home patterns also showed higher percentages of insecure attachment representations and lower percentages of involvement with a romantic partner. Participants residing with their parents were, according to their parents' perceptions, less psychologically healthy.

Adaptation, Psychological↗

The psychophysiology of adult attachment relationships: Autonomic reactivity in marital and premarital interactions.

To better understand the origins of autonomic reactivity during marital interactions, this study examined the psychophysiological profiles of prototypically secure (vs. insecure) and deactivating (vs. hyperactivating) adults while they talked about areas of disagreement with their (pre)marital partners. Adults who idealized their caregivers and/or normalized harsh childhood experiences during the Adult Attachment Interview (i.e., deactivating adults) manifested heightened electrodermal reactivity, a sign of emotional inhibition, while attempting to resolve conflict in their relationships, whereas individuals who became angrily or passively caught up while discussing their early lives (i.e., hyperactivating adults) later showed increases in heart rate while conversing with their partners, suggesting behavioral activation. In contrast, security was associated with low levels of electrodermal change from baseline in the context of this normatively mild marital stressor. Results were generally consistent for 40 younger engaged and 40 mature married couples.

Adolescent↗

Predicting abuse in adolescent dating relationships over 1 year: the role of child maltreatment and trauma.

Three mediators of the relationship between childhood maltreatment and dating violence perpetration during midadolescence (i.e., trauma-related symptoms, attitudes justifying dating violence, and empathy and self-efficacy in dating relationships) were tested over 1 year with a sample of students from 10 high schools (N = 1,317). Trauma-related symptoms had a significant cross-time effect on predicting incidents of dating violence for both boys and girls. Attitudes and empathy and self-efficacy did not predict dating violence over time, although they were correlated with such behavior at both time points. Child maltreatment is a distal risk factor for adolescent dating violence, and trauma-related symptoms act as a significant mediator of this relationship. The importance of longitudinal methodology that separates correlates from predictors is discussed.

Adolescent↗

Accuracy and bias in the perception of the partner in a close relationship.

Partners in close relationships can be both accurate and biased in their perceptions of each other. Moreover, sometimes a bias can lead to accuracy. The authors describe a paradigm for the simultaneous measurement of accuracy and bias in 2-person relationships. One prevalent bias in close relationships is assumed similarity: Does the person think that his or her partner sees the world as he or she does? In a study of 238 dating and married heterosexual couples, the authors found evidence for both bias and accuracy: the bias effects were considerably stronger, especially when the measure was linked to the relationship. They found little or no evidence for gender differences in accuracy and bias.

Courtship↗